Sex Gets Real 175: Sensual BDSM porn, inconsistent sex, & inorgasmic partners

Guess what? LOLA is sponsoring this week’s episode. You can get pads, tampons, and liners delivered to you, via their rad subscription service, at 60% off your first order when you subscribe. Just use promo code SGR when you visit mylola.com and get started.

My bi-weekly Sex is a Social Skill calls are a fun conversation where we practice all sorts of skills and geek out over sex and relationships. Check out the details and join in the fun.

This week it’s you and me and all your emails. Let’s dive in.

Ariyanna wrote in about how the show changed her life. Coleman, too! Yay for learning from this show.

Jess needs help finding BDSM porn that isn’t extreme or just about the fucking. She wants sensual, intimate, connected porn that is also kinky. Where can she turn? I have a few suggestions, including EroticFilms.com. That’s my affiliate link, and all the films on the website are curated by Erika Lust, so most of them are super sensual. Also, check out Jackie St. James, Crashpad, and Madison Young.

Johnny wrote in wanting to give his partner an orgasm.  He says all his previous partners orgasmed from penetration alone (which I highly doubt). But his current girlfriend has never had an orgasm and he NEEDS to give her one because he’s horrified. Long time listeners know this is one of those questions that gets me up on my soapbox, so let’s talk about why orgasm is NOT the goal of sex. Also, the fastest way to not orgasm is to expect an orgasm. I have some big thoughts for Johnny, all of which I’m sure he won’t like.

Broad City Broad wants to know how she can find high quality lovers who actually want intimacy and connection, even if it’s not a romantic relationship. How did I do it? A lot of it was luck, but being honest in your dating profile is a big part of finding good lovers. I share a few more thoughts.

Greeney is struggling because she recently broke off a 10 year monogamous relationship. She developed a relationship with a polyamorous man, who just recently moved away. She’s rekindling her relationship with the monogamous ex and wants to try and make all of it work. My thoughts? Don’t. Hiding & lying as a way to claim you’re trying not to hurt someone aren’t the way to not hurt someone.

Darkness Wonderer is worried that the sex with her partner is sporadic and that she gets turned on by women. Is she secretly a lesbian? Should their sex be more consistent? Why doesn’t she want sex like she used to? There’s a lot to unpack.

A high school sophomore wants to ask out bisexual junior. How can he find out whether she prefers women or men and how to ask her out. Ahhh high school.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It’s true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

About Dawn Serra

Sex Gets Real host, Dawn SerraI am the creator and host of the laughter-filled, no-holds-barred weekly podcast, Sex Gets Real. I lecture at colleges and universities on sex and relationships, too.

When I’m not speaking and teaching, I also work one-on-one with clients who need to get unstuck around their pleasure and desire.

But it’s not all work! In my downtime, I can often be found watching an episode of Masterchef Australia, cooking up something delicious, or adventuring with my sexy AF husband.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don’t forget about I Heart Radio’s Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for “sex gets real”.
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it’s anonymous)

  • Dawn
  • August 20, 2017