Sex Gets Real Episode 86

Rhonda Rousey versus Dawn Serra.

We’re finally back on track after losing some episodes a few weeks back. We revisit a listener email about self-sucking. Should he introduce his talent to his wife? The thought kind of turns him on.

Then, Dawn and Dylan talk about masturbation being a sin along with a new superpower: zombiefying vagina goo. Scary stuff.

If you like a cushy, gel-like lube for anal, what’s a body safe option?

And, a shout-out to Yay Sex, some sex education friends who make rad videos about sex.

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Episode breakdown

  • 0:37 – Dylan accidentally posted a racist meme.
  • 2:49 – Celebrity dick pics. Apparently Dawn isn’t the only one who wants one.
  • 3:41 – Jimmy wrote in about self-sucking. Sadly, that was one of the things we lost in the bathtub incident. So…take two with sucking your own dick.
  • 6:30 – Mutual masturbation can be so hot, so bringing in self-sucking isn’t that different.
  • 7:37 – Most people get all of their ideas about what sex looks like from porn, romance novels, Hollywood TV shows and movies, and anything outside of that can be surprising or feel strange.
  • 8:13 – Dylan wonders how many other couples discuss their masturbation frequency and techniques. She and the wife do.
  • 9:54 – It’s healthy to talk about masturbation with your partner(s) and to be able to have those sexual conversations with ease, but it’s also healthy to have some autonomy and to have your own sexual experiences without having to tell your partner(s) all the things.
  • 10:40 – Sometimes when we bring new things into a conversation, our partners might react poorly because we aren’t taught how to have sexual conversations. As long as they don’t shame you, give them time to process on their own and then circle back.
  • 11:50 – It takes courage to share new things with a partner when it comes to sex, but imagine the possibilities if it goes well.
  • 12:27 – Dylan is air fucking in her chair again.
  • 14:01 – It can be really helpful to show your partner pictures of what you mean when you introduce a new idea to remove some of the stigma and some of the defensiveness because people often jump to the most extreme version of whatever you’re talking about.
  • 15:43 – Dawn just started watching Weeds and one of the characters gets into some foot porn.
  • 17:23 – If you haven’t seen it yet, you should check out this advertisement Dawn posted on the Sex Gets Real Facebook page about masturbation.
  • 19:00 – Just think of all the things you’ve done to your Devil’s doorbell and sin cave.
  • 20:48 – If you want to prevent teen pregnancy, at least invite teens to masturbate. Or as Dawn says, give your teen a Costco sized-box of cum rags and let them go to town.
  • 21:21 – And another Weeds reference. This time with bananas.
  • 23:07 – Special thanks to Amy Schumer for keeping it real when it comes to sex.
  • 24:21 – Who is hazing Hilary Clinton?!?!
  • 25:33 – Ready to read about vagina zombie-fying goo? We have the goods right here.
  • 26:42 – According to YouTube user Sandman, women can use their vagina powers to turn men into walking, talking zombies. And he has PROOF.
  • 29:19 – Dylan had no idea she had that much power with her vagina goo.
  • 30:10 – There is some REALLY scary information out there, so if you don’t educate your kids about sex, someone like this Sandman might do it for you.
  • 30:41 – We are discussing the hand motion for air fingering yourself.
  • 31:10 – Yes, we went off the rails a bit with the silliness, but it all comes back to the fact that these MRAs and pick-up artists really believe this stuff. It’s the reason they go into movie theaters and shoot the place up – because they believe they are owed access to women’s bodies.
  • 32:06 – Not to mention how binary and hetero all this stuff is. Can vagina goo work on other women if you’re gay?
  • 32:42 – Dawn was quoted in a Salon.com article about lube and Rhonda Rousey.
  • 34:01 – It’s one thing to give your opinion about how you have sex or to share stories about your own sexual experiences. It’s entirely another to give sex advice that ends up alienating huge groups of people because you aren’t a trained sex educator.
  • 35:24 – There are lots and lots and lots of reasons to use lube.
  • 35:59 – Rhonda didn’t like all of our feedback on all the reasons someone might need lube and said we were some “gritty kitty bitches” with “sandboxes” for vaginas.
  • 38:46 – All of us make mistakes when it comes to sex and advice and what’s right for all different kinds of bodies and situations because things are constantly shifting. But you take the feedback and you do better next time. You don’t name call.
  • 39:54 – Also, boo on Rousey for her transmisogynistic comments about a trans fighter.
  • 40:25 – Dawn got a new message on Fetlife that cracked her up. She shares.
  • 42:15 – Sending a message to someone online is not easy. How do you make a good first impression? How do you stand out? But for some reason most messages tend to either be totally offensive or completely ridiculous, and not in a fun way.
  • 44:06 – Everyone online has different criteria, too, so what turns Dawn off might be OK for someone else.
  • 44:35 – Tinder is a crap shoot because a lot of guys swipe right on everyone and just wait for matches before bothering to read profiles.
  • 45:18 – We got an email from our listener who is deployed overseas. Here is a link to a Storify about the lube presentation that was at a recent conference. It’s pretty technical, but it’s REALLY fascinating.
  • 49:13 – From that presentation, the lube expert recommends the following lubes if you want a thick, gel for anal (these are all body safe): Good Clean Love, Aloe Cadabra, Sliquid Sassy, Sliquid Satin, Hathor Aphrodisia, and Ride H2O.
  • 51:27 – Dylan wants to know if uberlube stained Dawn’s sheets.
  • 52:01 – The lube resource does say you can opt for an oil-based lube like Yes Oil or Coconu Oil, but just remember oil and latex should NEVER mix.

And be sure to pin, share, and Instagram this bad boy

On this week's episode of Sex Gets Real, Dawn and Dylan answer a listener who wants to know if he should tell his wife that he can suck his own cock. Plus, we learn the dangers of masturbating and the evil super power that vaginas have. Plus, shitty first messages from hookup sites.

  • Dawn
  • November 22, 2015