Sex Gets Real: Episode 74

Camping, public nudity, face licking, and more.

This episode is definitely a rainbow of all the things.

We’ve got some listener emails talking about the Hitachi Magic Wand, face licking, and a really deep question about a spouse who claims that being put up on a pedestal is killing her libido.

Dawn reports back on Sex Geek Summer Camp and the interesting things that unfolded there.

Plus, Dawn recently visited a Sacred Intimate for some hands-on healing work. Hear all the details of what happened and how profound the experience was for her.

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Episode breakdown

  • 0:54 – There’s going to be a lot of cursing this week. Fuck that shit.
  • 1:23 – Saying hello to our listener Sarah. Hi Sarah!
  • 1:45 – Charlie Glickman posted this amazing quote on his Facebook page, and Dawn cannot stop cracking up. Don’t be that guy.
  • 2:45 – Is it obvious that we’ve had WAY too much caffeine?
  • 2:55 – When someone asks if you’re a “full blown lesbian” and you’re like, WTF does that even mean?
  • 3:25 – Would you ask, “What capacity of hetero are you running today?” No. So why ask that about the queer folks?
  • 4:06Buzzfeed has this great video on shit cis people say. You would never ask someone about their genitals, but as soon as people find out someone is trans, suddenly that question is OK to ask. No. Just stop.
  • 4:48 – As of this moment, I don’t want to have sex with you. So…
  • 6:00 – If you find someone attractive and you’re not sure if they’re gay or lesbian, just go talk to them like a human being and say “I think you’re cool.” If they don’t pick that up and run with it, then move on. No need for inappropriate questions, folks.
  • 7:01 – A listener wrote in telling us about her boyfriend’s erogenous zone. Never heard of that before.
  • 8:41 – Let’s talk about the taint.
  • 8:57 – Dylan wants to know if her friend is going to try it before she buys it.
  • 9:29 – What do you do if an ex tells you you’re boring in bed?
  • 10:34 – Download our kinky Yes-No-Maybe list when you opt-in to our newsletter, folks.
  • 11:30 – Don’t throw insults or insecurities at a partner when you’re fighting. That is seriously below the belt.
  • 12:00 – Dawn needs to reel Dylan in on that one…you CAN be bad at sex if you really love it.
  • 12:20 – If a guy says he’s a pillow princess, will all women get sick of that shit? Let’s discuss.
  • 13:18 – Part of being a giving lover is sometimes doing things that are a little outside your wheelhouse because it makes your partner super happy.
  • 14:00 – Dawn talks about her discomfort being on top – that’s a lot of sassy woman to be bouncing around up there, but her partner loves it so she does it.
  • 15:24 – Our listener, Alexa, offers some Hitachi Magic Wand vibrator tips.
  • 16:30 – Her lover leaves his shirts for her to masturbate against. How hot is that?
  • 17:42 – Combine the wand with a dildo for some intense play time.
  • 18:04 – Dawn and Alex just went to Sex Geek Summer Camp (Dawn has an affiliate link if any of our listeners are interested in attending in 2016. It’s for sex educators.)
  • 19:00 – “Here’s my titties!”
  • 20:30 – Since we’re talking about being naked, here’s the article on an office that went naked as an experiment.
  • 21:40 – We often use clothes to try and control what people perceive of us, so in nude situations, you’re forced to drop a lot of that.
  • 23:30 – Dawn went to a play party at camp with Alex.
  • 25:41 – What happens when your go-to fantasy finally becomes a reality? Is it as hot as you’d imagined? Dawn experienced it and says no.
  • 29:55 – You can’t have camp without a talent show.
  • 31:28 – From Rocky Horror to singing to a demo on how to roll a condom on with your mouth and deep throat at the same time.
  • 32:18 – Dawn visited a sacred intimate. Read the details over on her blog.
  • 34:00 – The visit with the sacred intimate was very nurturing and spiritual and healing. Not at all sexual, despite the work being done.
  • 35:03 – This tantra breath Dawn learned helps keep you present and helps you move pleasure throughout your body and really check in with yourself. Beautiful stuff.
  • 37:45 – Exploring trauma in your body can be really powerful stuff.
  • 41:52 – Dylan has one thing to say: Oh my, God! NO!
  • 43:15 – If you want to see a sacred intimate or a hands-on body worker, make sure you vet them thoroughly – certifications, references, etc. Since it’s a field that isn’t regulated, you can get some unqualified folks claiming to be healers.
  • 45:34 – Rob the Love Robot wrote in and said we need to add someone to our Famous Men Who’ve Been Pegged list. We can’t believe we missed it. Game of Thrones – so much pegging.
  • 47:14 – Rockhard in Rockville sent in a serious question. Is adoring your spouse too much a turn-off? His wife says yes.
  • 49:33 – Folks who feel like they’re put up on a pedestal can feel a lot of pressure to always be perfect.
  • 50:50 – It’s unfair to make one person your entire world. Yes, you can love someone, but it’s important to also have friends and family who can be your support network, too. This is part of a healthy relationship that’s not overly enmeshed and codependent.
  • 53:10 – Sometimes you need to sit down with your partner/spouse and give them space to say the things that they’ve been holding inside. The tough part is not to take it personally if they say things that hurt to receive.
  • 53:53 – The love languages quiz is a fun tool. The book is too religious and Christian for Dawn’s taste, but just the high-level quiz can be really helpful in a relationship.
  • 57:02 – Physical performance isn’t the only thing at play here. You can have lots of types of sex and pleasure without a hard cock.
  • 57:15 – The number one libido killer is stress.

And be sure to pin, share, and Instagram this bad boy

This week on Sex Gets Real, listeners write in about face licking, Hitachi Magic Wands, and a spouse who doesn't want sex because her husband is too nice. Dawn also talks about public sex at Sex Geek Summer Camp and her recent visit to a Sacred Intimate. And that's just the beginning.

  • Dawn
  • August 30, 2015