Sex Gets Real: Episode 52

From penis size (again) to pinball machines, from jealousy to one-hit wonder orgasms – plus a special guest

This episode is brought to you by Yes Please, More Please – the art of seduction through food. Don’t miss their Mexican Aphrodisiac dinner in Washington, DC on April 4, 2015.

We have a very special in-studio guest this week (who happens to have a sore ass, courtesy of Dawn). We revisit penis sizes and balls, plus listener advice and confessions from previous episodes.

One listener, Alexa, needs help with falling into old habits when it comes to communication styles and wanting to work on removing jealousy. Another listener claims to be a one hit wonder with her orgasms. Can she come in other positions?

Don’t forget that SEXx Interactive in Philly is right around the corner and Dawn will be there. Learn more here.

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Episode breakdown

  • 2:57 – Our listener, Rob, writes in with a suggestion for a position people trying to accommodate too-big dicks can use.
  • 4:12 – We also got a listener story from Jenn about the best fuck she’s ever had – it involves a Rolling Stone pinball machine. Ka-ching.
  • 5:16 – Ewwwww. Shot ropes AGAIN?!?!
  • 6:29 – If you’re fucking on a pinball machine, it would only be truly epic with the sound effects, right?
  • 7:22 – Pool tables – those can be hot for fucking. Lance Hart did a recent scene where he got pegged on one.
  • 7:58 – There’s always a way to up the ante when it comes to games. Dawn has a suggestion for the next time Dylan and the wife play pool.
  • 9:26 – Dawn wants to leave her ass print all over the place.
  • 10:00 – We revisit last week’s episode on the New York Times article examining Google data and what people search for sex. With a guy in the studio, we want to know if Alex has searched Google with questions about his penis, too.
  • 12:02 – We are fans of porn on this show, but porn is often used in a context that it was never meant to be used – it’s not an educational tool, it’s not realistic, and it shouldn’t be the standards we use to compare ourselves against. Alex speaks to the pressure of fitting the masculine myth.
  • 12:57 – SOOOO frustrating – when a guy comes and thinks that means sex is over. Grrrrrr.
  • 13:23 – Is Dawn the only person who searches for lovemaking on the porn sites?
  • 14:46 – Knowing the size of your penis can be helpful – especially when you want to find condoms that fit nicely which increases sensation and enjoyment.
  • 15:20 – Custom fit condoms are a thing. Everyone should buy them. Way more pleasurable for the wearer.
  • 15:50 – Investing in a variety pack of different sizes, fits, and styles is a great excuse for more sex. Let’s try ALL the sizes!
  • 16:51 – Alex is a condom expert – so when he says that a good fit makes things more pleasurable, trust.
  • 17:49 – It pisses us off that female condoms are so difficult to find. They’re so awesome. Let’s start a movement, people!
  • 19:05 – The disconnect between heterosexual men and heterosexual women when it comes to sex is drastic.
  • 20:16 – Dawn has a funny story that a friend told her about Viagra.
  • 21:25 – My dick is big, so it’s going to be amazing! (Um, no.)
  • 22:55 – We need to change our assumptions around sex and disabilities, and sex and age. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.
  • 24:50 – Thigh strap-ons are awesome.
  • 25:05 – Let’s change the stigma around strap-ons. It makes an amazing part of everyone’s sex life, even hetero couples. Get one, folks.
  • 25:53 – Bruise that pussy.
  • 26:09 – Alex offers advice to guys who are insecure about their penis size.
  • 26:41 – Dylan wants to know if there’s a correlation between balls and penis sizes.
  • 28:03 – Is worrying about the size of your balls a thing? And boys are often concerned about asymmetry.
  • 29:09 – Where do you measure from? Under the dick or over the dick? Dylan has a tricky answer for that one.
  • 31:20 – Flaccid vs. hard – Dylan wonders if there’s a correlation there, too?
  • 32:14 – The size of your penis is one tool among many in a great sex life, so get to know all the other options if you want to be a rock star in the bedroom.
  • 33:34 – Alexa, a listener, writes in asking for help around changing her communication style if her old friends and lovers have a tendency to pull her back into old patterns and fights.
  • 35:28 – When you start behaving in a way that you don’t like, or when old fights you’re trying to let go of keep coming up, just noticing the behavior can work wonders over the long term to changing that behavior. You can’t change what you don’t notice.
  • 37:44 – Dawn suggests asking for support when you want to break old communication patterns with current relationships. People who love us want to help us when we make a genuine, non-threatening ask.
  • 43:03 – Dylan’s friends on learning her and the wife were non-monogamous sometimes: “Are you fucking serious?!?!”
  • 43:47 – Feelings are not facts – there’s no right or wrong, there’s just what you feel. You can have bad feelings even if you didn’t do anything wrong.
  • 44:21 – Fighting slut shaming one conversation at a time!
  • 45:03 – Another listener question from One Hit Wonder writes in asking about only being able to orgasm in one position. What gives?
  • 46:50 – Sometimes we train our bodies to come quickly a certain way. Breaking that pattern can be tough. Also, for people who like being on top, there’s an element of control. When our listener isn’t on top, she isn’t in control anymore.
  • 48:00 – Does her clit get a good rub when she’s on top? Maybe her body landscape is perfect for being on top and there’s nothing wrong with that – celebrate the orgasms, however they happen!
  • 49:24 – From doggie style, your clit’s not going to get shit unless a hand or a toy are introduced.
  • 51:30 – Don’t be goal oriented about the orgasm in other positions. That makes orgasms not happen. Just focus on pleasure and maximizing that without any goal in mind and then see what that mental relaxation does.
  • 52:10 – Butt plugs. We use them.
  • 53:07 – Sex and “supposed to” are a toxic combination. Sex is whatever it is. Enjoy that and let go of everything else.
  • 53:21 – 70% of women cannot orgasm from penis-in-vagina stimulation alone.
  • 53:39 – Alex shares a metaphor that porn is like a sports highlight reel. It’s not the real game with all the nuances.
  • 55:45 – Someone in the room got their ass pounded this morning.

And be sure to pin, share, and Instagram this bad boy

We've got a new episode of Sex Gets Real, featuring a special in-studio guest (who happens to have a sore ass, thanks to Dawn). We field listener questions about communication, only being able to orgasm in one position, plus some listener confessions and more on penis size.

  • Dawn
  • March 29, 2015